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01.19.04 - moving alright. I am more or less carless again. I mean, my car works but only for a limited time. So, it's back to the bus. Back to waiting in the cold, back to bus passes, and leaving the house early and getting home late. So hey, if you wanna hang out, pick me up, okay. I have a limited time left in Austin. I will be moving in June. June, is right around the corner. It seems nearer and nearer everyday. Perhaps this is because I actually have a goal now. Time flies when your'e on an agenda. So, you ask, where am I going? Well, I will tell you-----Los Angeles. That's right baby. California. I am going where everybody goes to make something of themselves. Why you ask, when I live in the live music capital of the world. Well, one, because it is not the live music capital of the world and hasn't been ever since they started posting that at the airport, and two, because I don't want to be thirty or forty years old playing the same shows to the same friends. I love my friends, but hey, they aren't really pushstarting my career. The wonderful band I had is not reuniting, I have no girlfriend, I have no wife, I have no children. Why not start anew? Sometimes you have to try....
01.13.04 - ICEHOUSE. I recently had a friend pass away. A friend of my same age. A friend who grew up with me, since I was at least 12. A friend who lived with me on two different occassions. A friend I got in fights with. A friend who got in fights for me. A friend I got into car chases with. Who I stayed the night with, who I watched get married, who I saw get divorced, whose child I witnessed being born. A friend who I saw in the pit of dispair and a friend who I saw happy as a child. A friend I skated with, a friend I did drugs with. A friend I got drunk with, watched movies with. A friend I went to court for, twice. A friend who I shared a lifetime of experiences with, his lifetime. I never saw it coming, although I saw it all along. Joey I love ya. I hope your happier where you are now. Rest in Peace Buda. Rest In Peace.
12.15.03 - a weekend smoke, lots of smoke. it is filling my lungs and encircling my life, figuratively, that is. It isn't like I am standing in a fire. Did I already stop making sense? Anyway, party 12midnight, show 4am, hang downtime. work 6am, sleep 5pm, wake 8pm, bar 11pm, 1am food, sleep, laundry, cars, party 10pm, free beer, 2am tired. Bed 3am, work 5:30am, more beer with wonderful conversation companion 2pm. Home 6pm. T.V. mail, frozen pizza, and time for the journal, that was a weekend. As long as they continue I know I am still alive. Yup, I am still alive. 11.12.03 - pay attentionit's been a heck of a few days, my electric friends. my silent friends, my imaginary audience. I have been up and down and all around in my outlook. I tell ya, life changes so fast all the time, you never know what is coming or going or anything. We just have to be prepared, and for what we don't know. I have narrowed everything in my life down to one dream. Everything else, just doesn't matter. That isn't true, there are many other things that matter, and are even more important than a dream. However, having a goal is important. So on we strive. I am not really sure what all this babbling is boiling down to other than, you need to pay attention. Lord knows I have a problem paying attention sometimes, but we need to pay attention, because some things don't come around twice. That goes for everything, friends, family members, loved ones, opportunities, etc. I am not preaching, or saying that I always pay attention, but I try to, and I am suggesting that you, pay attention as well. Before you know it, it will all be different.
11.03.03 - so it goes so it goes. and it does go. and I am still going. and I am still here. and I have asked to leave. I asked to go if there was nothing for me to do.
but I am still here. so I guess, I have something important enough to do.
so I will continue, and I will do, whatever it is I am supposed to do. I say it is music, because I can't think of another thing. I am not good at so many other things. I dropped out of school, I couldn't focus, all I could do was think about music and recording and playing and performing and on and on and on, that is all I want anymore. sometimes I think it is the only way I can truly be happy, is that sad? I hope not. because I do still hope. you know if you read this, I need your input. I need your ideas and thoughts on all this stuff I am doing. so go to my message board and tell me what you think, I read that shit ya-know. I respond to it too.
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